Freedom or the Chain

Our family loves our dog. We have so much fun with her. The kids love to play with her in the garden and to wrestle and cuddle her in the house. She is well fed and well loved. We have let her know that she is a welcomed and loved addition to our family. We have "treat trained" her from the beginning. She has learned that we are the givers of all good things. She knows that the result of obedience is a treat, praise, and love. She knows that we are where she wants to be. She has demonstrated her desire to be close to us. Often, when the gate has been left open accidentally, even over night, she has refused to wander. We have even seen people outside of the gate call her and her refuse to leave the property.

So what is up with my dog these days?! She has run off 10 times in the last 12 days! Sometimes twice a day. When she first started the new behaviour, I did some research to see what could be driving it. She has been "fixed" and so she can't be wandering to find a mate. She is not unloved or failed to bond with our family. She is not neglected and is far from under fed. So, what is it that seems to compel her to disobey?

We have given more attention and have tried all the training tricks we know, our friends know, or we have been able to glean from the internet. Nothing has worked. So we have had to resort to the the chain. Only the chain will keep her from running off at a moments notice. We don't want to chain her. We want her to have the run of the garden as she has for the last 18 months. We enjoy the fluidity of the relationship when she comes in and out of the house and can freely roam about the property with us.

She has now lost the freedom found in a caring relationship because she has refused to accept the loving parameters. She has chosen the chain through her behaviour.

Yesterday, I was out in the garden with her. I was hanging laundry and "giving her lots of fuss" as the British say. I played fetch with her and gave her treats. I had her off the chain and we were having fun together. I went into the house to grab a bite to eat and check on the next load of laundry. 3 minutes later the phone rang. Someone was calling from their mobile phone to let me know they had my dog. They happened to be walking by and had caught her less than 50 feet from our house. She had just been experiencing all the best parts about life with our family, and had chosen to run off as soon as my back was turned. Crazy!

Then I remember my last week.

My wife left for a week of ministry in Asia a week ago Saturday. I had purposed with a friend whose wife was also going to be travelling to the event, that we would make good use of the time with our kids and our God while our wives were away. We agreed that we would have extra uninterrupted time in the evenings for solitude and silence with God. We would have more time to spend focused uninterrupted time with Him.  I as looking forward to the week for the special times with my kids and my God.

I had a great week with the kids. Although they were under the weather for much of the week, we had many special times together and made some neat memories together.

My week with God started out well. I had a wonderful extended time with Him on Sunday afternoon. Then, I flipped on the TV in the evening. It's not that I watched anything bad on TV, but I was just channel surfing. I watch 15 minutes of this and 30 minutes of that. I watched nothing at all but I watched it until 2AM.

My week was an odd sort of wandering. I had some really sweet times with God, seeing Him throughout my day, praying for my wife, talking with some friends. But each evening I would forget the sweetness of fellowship and simply go wandering on the TV, through the internet, just wandering. Looking for I don't know what. I just went wandering into the wee hours of the morning.

God is the giver of all good things, and I experienced this last week, but I also experienced the wandering. I am so grateful that He protected me. I could have been wounded on my late night wanderings. There certainly is a lot of crap, a lot of dangerous stuff for my soul that I could have pursued. Even when I stumbled across it, He gave me the insight and the power to turn away. But, I should not have been lingering in those dangerous places.

Why did I wander? I don't know all the answers. I think part of it was loneliness. I was missing the interactions with my wife, but instead of turning to my ever present Friend and Confidant, I filled the lonely place with noise and information that does not satisfy. There were moments of such sweet fellowship with God throughout the week, but there was also so much mindless wandering!

I don't want to wander. Neither do I want to be like my stubbornly rebellious dog who refuses to be trained. I don't want to be chained. I have experienced the slavery of addiction as well as the chain of the law. The law can help to harness, but it cannot bring true freedom.

True freedom is fount in trust and birthed through relationship. If I will learn to trust that the parameters the Father has given me come from love, if I will learn to heed His still small voice, I will find the freedom that comes from submission to my Good God. I am finding it, bit by bit, one day at a time.