Freedom or the Chain

Our family loves our dog. We have so much fun with her. The kids love to play with her in the garden and to wrestle and cuddle her in the house. She is well fed and well loved. We have let her know that she is a welcomed and loved addition to our family. We have "treat trained" her from the beginning. She has learned that we are the givers of all good things. She knows that the result of obedience is a treat, praise, and love. She knows that we are where she wants to be. She has demonstrated her desire to be close to us. Often, when the gate has been left open accidentally, even over night, she has refused to wander. We have even seen people outside of the gate call her and her refuse to leave the property.

So what is up with my dog these days?! She has run off 10 times in the last 12 days! Sometimes twice a day. When she first started the new behaviour, I did some research to see what could be driving it. She has been "fixed" and so she can't be wandering to find a mate. She is not unloved or failed to bond with our family. She is not neglected and is far from under fed. So, what is it that seems to compel her to disobey?

We have given more attention and have tried all the training tricks we know, our friends know, or we have been able to glean from the internet. Nothing has worked. So we have had to resort to the the chain. Only the chain will keep her from running off at a moments notice. We don't want to chain her. We want her to have the run of the garden as she has for the last 18 months. We enjoy the fluidity of the relationship when she comes in and out of the house and can freely roam about the property with us.

She has now lost the freedom found in a caring relationship because she has refused to accept the loving parameters. She has chosen the chain through her behaviour.

Yesterday, I was out in the garden with her. I was hanging laundry and "giving her lots of fuss" as the British say. I played fetch with her and gave her treats. I had her off the chain and we were having fun together. I went into the house to grab a bite to eat and check on the next load of laundry. 3 minutes later the phone rang. Someone was calling from their mobile phone to let me know they had my dog. They happened to be walking by and had caught her less than 50 feet from our house. She had just been experiencing all the best parts about life with our family, and had chosen to run off as soon as my back was turned. Crazy!

Then I remember my last week.

My wife left for a week of ministry in Asia a week ago Saturday. I had purposed with a friend whose wife was also going to be travelling to the event, that we would make good use of the time with our kids and our God while our wives were away. We agreed that we would have extra uninterrupted time in the evenings for solitude and silence with God. We would have more time to spend focused uninterrupted time with Him.  I as looking forward to the week for the special times with my kids and my God.

I had a great week with the kids. Although they were under the weather for much of the week, we had many special times together and made some neat memories together.

My week with God started out well. I had a wonderful extended time with Him on Sunday afternoon. Then, I flipped on the TV in the evening. It's not that I watched anything bad on TV, but I was just channel surfing. I watch 15 minutes of this and 30 minutes of that. I watched nothing at all but I watched it until 2AM.

My week was an odd sort of wandering. I had some really sweet times with God, seeing Him throughout my day, praying for my wife, talking with some friends. But each evening I would forget the sweetness of fellowship and simply go wandering on the TV, through the internet, just wandering. Looking for I don't know what. I just went wandering into the wee hours of the morning.

God is the giver of all good things, and I experienced this last week, but I also experienced the wandering. I am so grateful that He protected me. I could have been wounded on my late night wanderings. There certainly is a lot of crap, a lot of dangerous stuff for my soul that I could have pursued. Even when I stumbled across it, He gave me the insight and the power to turn away. But, I should not have been lingering in those dangerous places.

Why did I wander? I don't know all the answers. I think part of it was loneliness. I was missing the interactions with my wife, but instead of turning to my ever present Friend and Confidant, I filled the lonely place with noise and information that does not satisfy. There were moments of such sweet fellowship with God throughout the week, but there was also so much mindless wandering!

I don't want to wander. Neither do I want to be like my stubbornly rebellious dog who refuses to be trained. I don't want to be chained. I have experienced the slavery of addiction as well as the chain of the law. The law can help to harness, but it cannot bring true freedom.

True freedom is fount in trust and birthed through relationship. If I will learn to trust that the parameters the Father has given me come from love, if I will learn to heed His still small voice, I will find the freedom that comes from submission to my Good God. I am finding it, bit by bit, one day at a time.

Houdini the dog

When we first brought Oreo, our dog, home, she would find amazing ways to get out of the garden. I took to calling her Houdini, after the famous the escape artist.

I came up with several different plans and adaptations to her environment to try to keep her in, only to get a call from a neighbour to come and pick her up, yet again. We trained her and eventually, she stopped escaping.

She is now full grown and has no problem leaping onto and over the wall, but she doesn't. In fact, we often find her peering over the wall at us from on top of her dog house as we return home. Even when the gate is left wide open, she won't leave. Over the last 18 months she has decided that she likes it here and isn't interested in leaving. 

Suddenly, this seems to have changed. My dog is doing her best impression of Houdini again.

She has run off 3 times in the last 2 days. Twice people in town have found her and called the number on the tag for us to come retrieve her. The third time was this morning when we found her patiently waiting outside the gate to be let back in for breakfast. We have no idea how long she had been roaming the neighbourhood.

Our theory is that the dog is searching for my wife. They have formed quite a bond. My wife is in Asia for a week, and Oreo seems to be pining for her. On one level this is very sweet, but whatever the reason for the wandering, we have to stop it for her own good. 

What the dog doesn't understand, is that it is dangerous for her to be wandering around out there. She could be very easily hit by a car, or get into some other dangerous situation. She is not particularly dumb, for a dog, but she simply doesn't understand the ramifications of her choices. That is why we have to protect her with walls and gates. That is why we have to put her on the chain when we bring her back. That is why we have to manufacture small consequences to protect her from the unthinkably bad consequences. 

Once again, I find myself thinking about God. 

Why do I run off? Why do I feel the need to wander when everything I need, everything I really want is freely offered to me by my Master? If I'm honest, it can be fun to roam, but that's only because I haven't tripped over the consequences yet. So, God puts parameters around us. He says, "Your life will be better if you stay close to me and if you live within the fences I put around you." But somehow the fences beg to be jumped. Something in me wants to leap over and see if it really is as dangerous as all that. 

God graciously, kindly metes out the discipline that I need to train me. He doesn't want me to pay the price for my sin. He has already done that. He doesn't punish His children, but He does train us for our own good. He gives us small consequences to prevent us from bringing the larger consequences on ourselves. He has already paid the ultimate price and received the consequences in Himself. Now, He offers abundant life, a life within limits...good limits. 

I hope that my dog will remember that she likes it here. I hope that she will stop wandering. I hope I'll stop wandering too.