It's All About Relationship

We are inherently relational creatures. We were made for relationship. We are not independent or anonymous. We have identity and individuality, but these are the precursors for relationship. They allow us to be ourselves and to offer ourselves to others. We have personality that distinguishes us from those around us but we are not designed to be isolated from people and things around us. We must be connected, interrelated or we perish. 

This relational core to who we are is grounded in the root of our being. We were created in the image of God and God exists in eternal relationship within the three persons who make up the Godhead. We were created to enter into and relate to The Three-in-One God and this ability to relate is knit into our very being. We were literally created to relate. 

We were also created to be connected to other people. We do not come into being alone, but are born into relationship with those around us. Some of us were born into nurturing families and others into dangerous and destructive families, but we cannot survive our infancy without someone taking an interest in us and sustaining our lives. We literally can not live without community. 

As we grow up we learn to operate independently from those around us. We no longer need to be spoon-fed and diaper changed, but in this normal and healthy process of individuation and growing independence, we can begin to believe the lie that we don't need anyone else. Especially now, in an age of relative wealth and incredible technological innovation, we can live more isolated than ever. We stay continually connected with the world through our screens and keyboards, while actually living more isolated from real relationships.

We were created to connect. It is now and has always been about relationship. We were made in Their image. The image of the Trinitarian God. The Relational Community God of the scriptures. We cannot learn how to relate to God while remaining distant, isolated, or stunted in our interpersonal relationships. We must learn how to trust and to live in community with one another, or we are kidding ourselves about living with God. He has created us for community. 

It's all about relationship. It always has been. 

Instant Maturity

I was talking to a friend today about growth. He is growing and it is my privilege to walk alongside him on this leg of the journey. As we were talking, he mentioned how discouraged he was that he was not further along.

I resonate with that. There have been many times in my life that I find myself wondering how long I will continue to struggle in the same area. How many times I will make the same mistakes?Many of us are not where we want to be, where we aspire to be. We want to be further on in our walk, more mature, and we want it yesterday. (On the other hand, I see many who have implicitly decided that more is not possible. They have fallen into apathy and self-satisfaction, but that is a topic for another day.)

As I talked to my friend this morning, our conversation meandered to the topic of trees. He told me that it takes seven to eight years for a fruit tree to reach maturity. It starts can start to bear fruit within 3 years but has a long way to go to maturity. We can create the right environment for growth and protect it from impediments to growth, but ultimately it just takes that long for it to grow to maturity. It is unrealistic to expect a tree to grow faster than it will grow. It would be silly to get frustrated at a tree for not growing faster.

I think that we are often frustrated with our growth because we have been given false expectations. We live in a post-industrial information age. We have grown used to mechanistic growth and the idea that a new and improved formula can produce greater, faster, and more efficient growth than ever before. We are accustomed to nearly instant everything.  This mindset has crept into all areas of our life including our spiritual life and has warped our expectations.

This unrealistic cultural expectation is further exacerbated by an over simplistic understanding of the Gospel. We have reduced the gospel to merely the atonement, ie. getting saved. While it is true that the death and resurrection of Christ is the central historical fact of the Christianity, the Gospel is much more than simply that. The Good News is that we have been invited into a relationship with the Triune God. The atoning sacrifice of Christ makes this possible, but the Good News is more than just getting saved. We can enter into a vibrant, live giving relationship with God that begins here and now and lasts forever. This is the Gospel.

Like any relationship, it begins at some point, but the beginning is not the end. It is merely the launching point for a new kind of life, a life with God. It takes time for us to grow to maturity. It will be years, not days or weeks, or even months from spiritual birth to maturity. We must not be too hard on ourselves in the process, but neither should we give up the pressing on that is required of us. We must do all we can to eliminate the things that will impede our growth and to build into our lives the things that will promote it, but ultimately we grow organically at the rate of the Spirit. The Spirit is not slow as some understand slowness, and neither does He move too fast.

At just the right speed, He is creating the new and improved version of me. One day at a time, one small step of growth at a time, I am being made mature and complete. I am not there yet, but I am on the way.